Painting with Pyro
by ColdFusion180
Summary: Piotr learns the hard way why Pyro shouldn't be near paint.


**Painting with Pyro**

It was a typical afternoon at the Acolyte base and Piotr was in his private art studio. Actually it was a small room that used to be for hazardous waste but Magneto had found a method of disposing of it whenever the Acolytes end up with some. So Piotr had converted it into a place where he could go to paint. Magneto didn't mind as long as it didn't interfere with his duties, which mainly involved moving anything heavy around.

The room was well ventilated and was one of the few rooms in the base that had a window. Piotr had used what savings he had to buy supplies and had several cans of paint, brushes and canvases available to him. After putting on a painting smock and opening the window he walked over to his latest project. Looking it over he selected a thin brush and dipped it into a cup of light blue paint and was about to apply it to the canvas when the door opened.

"Ello Colossus! What 'cha doing?"

Piotr sighed. "Pyro, I am working on a project and I would like to be left alone."

"Ahh, please don't send me away! No one wants me around today! Gambit's pining over that shelia he likes and Sabertooth threatened to disembowel me if I bothered him."

"Well, alright. Just don't touch anything."

"Whatever you say mate. Hey, these are pretty good," Pyro said looking at some of the finished paintings that were hung on the walls. "What's this one?"

"That's a portrait of my home back in Russia," Piotr replied a small bit of longing in his voice.

"Ah, and this?"

"A Daoist landscape."

"Huh, ever do anything like animals or people?"

"Sometimes."

"Ah, well these are great. I wish I could paint like that. Then I could illustrate me novels. Hey I got an idea. Why don't you paint them for me?"

"Why?"

"Oh come on Colossus, think about it. We can be partners, make a bunch of books and sell 'em for money."

"Pyro, Magneto supplies us with money already."

"Well we could always use some more. What do you say?"

"Well…"

"Here, think about a picture for this chapter," Pyro said reaching into his pocket and pulling out a black notebook. "She walked toward him, the stone floor clicking from the sound of her shoes. Her hands moved to the clasp at her throat. She opened it, allowing the cloak around her shoulders to fall to the floor. Her wet skin reflected the candlelight of the room. Their hearts began beating together, slowly picking up speed…"

"No. no, I don't think so," said Piotr blushing heavily.

"Please?"

"No."

"Fine. Hey, what's that you're working on?"

"It's a portrait of my sister," Piotr replied. "I have been working on this for weeks."

"Ah, well she certainly is a nice little Sheila. Hmmm, not much to do in here."

Piotr sighed and tried to ignore the talkative Australian as he worked on his painting.

"You think we'll be getting a new television soon? I mean, yeah it was Gambit's fault for smashing the last one to bits…"

"Yes."

"But in his defense Sabertooth shouldn't have thrown him that hard, I mean the guy only asked about his hair and all…"

"Hmm."

"What aren't there more Martha Stewart fans out there? People should appreciate someone who can turn useless things into works of art."

"Ahh."

"Hey, these brushes are nice. Mind if I use them to polish my flamethrowers?"

"Uh…"

"Thanks a lot mate. They've been looking a little dull lately... AHHH, GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!"

"What?"

"I stepped in something! It's all over me boots! Yucky paint, what an awful color. Does this paint stain?"

"Yes."

"Is it water soluble?"

"Yes."

"Is it flammable?"

"Yes," Piotr responding without thinking. Two seconds later. "Uh oh…"

BOOOOOOMMMMMM!

A few minutes later Piotr found himself on his back, his face covered with soot. He slowly got up and brushed himself off, gazing at the wrecked remains of his studio. That's when he spied the painting he'd been working on. At least he thought it was the one he'd been working on. It was a charred mess. Carefully, he tried to pick it up only to have it disintegrate immediately when he touched it.

"Ah, well that one thing paint is good for," Pyro laughed. "Ah, yah gotta love it when things burn. Well, what else should we do Colossus?"

Piotr slowly turned toward the Australian with a dangerous look, armoring up as he did so.

"Uh Colossus, you ok mate? Umm, look sorry about everything and all. Uh, would you stop looking at me like that?" Pyro gulped as Piotr began to advance toward him. "Uh Colossus, he he. It was an accident really! Oh boy…"

In another part of the base Magneto emerged from his private office with a sigh of content. "Ah, everything is going well. My plans are progressing as scheduled and the men are finally beginning to get along."

"AAAHHH! SAVE ME! SAVE ME!" Pyro yelled running by with an enraged Piotr behind him holding a huge metal water tank above his head

"GET BACK HERE AND DIE COWARD!"

"NOOOO! HELP! NOT THE WATER! AAAGGGHHH!"

Magneto watched the sight for a moment and then began to bang his head against the wall. "Why! Why can't they get along for one day? Why?"

**Disclaimer: I do not own X-Men: Evolution.**


End file.
